For some bizarre reason, Tesla Motor Corp has decided that because I have written about motorsports and motor cars in the past, that I probably might like to buy their new Cybercab. I seems that certain select customers, and other people whom the algorithm thinks are likely to part with a lot of coin, are now being invited to purchase Cybercab for personal use.
See the following screenshot:
Immediately I have a problem.
I am not in the United States.
Firstly, given that Tesla Motor Corp unilaterally cancelled their Cybertruck for Australian delivery after delivering (checks notes) zero, and having also kept the non-refundable deposit (extortion), then I do not know why they think that I would even be inclined to part with any coin at all. Australia is already a once-bitten, twice-shy market.
Secondly, the pricing structure is very very off putting.
USD 29,990 - Est Purchase Price
USD 1,000 - non-refundable deposit (extortion)
USD 39,468 - Autonomy Subscription (being 299/mo x 121mo, which is how long I've had the Mazda 2).
USD 70,458 - being just the capital cost for the vehicle.
AUD 103,090 - Tesla Cybercab
versus
AUD 28,990 - Mazda 2
The difference is so shocking that I do not even need to do a whole of life comparison to know that at no point whatsoever, does a Tesla Cybercab make any economic sense for me.
When you also consider that there is no private AC charging, no wireless charging as originally promised which means that you have to pay for Tesla supercharging; and that the system is such that the Cybercab is supposed to navigate itself to a charger when it’s low, then the use case starts to reveal itself.
The Tesla Cybercab was never designed to be used for personal use. It is purely a purpose built fleet vehicle. The only way that this makes any economic sense is if a commercial operation like Uber, or some other big taxi fleet company like GM Cabs, 13-Cabs, Premier Cabs, or Legion Cabs, buys up loads of these with the express purpose of running them instead of employing taxi drivers.
Salaries for taxi drivers in Sydney, ranges between about $50,000 to $70,000 for a Senior-level driver with more than 8 years of experience. When viewed in that light, and using the ATO Depreciation Rates for Taxicabs with an effective Life of 4 years...
USD 29,990 - Est Purchase Price
USD 1,000 - non-refundable deposit (extortion)
USD 39,468 - Autonomy Subscription (being 299/mo x 48mo)
USD 45,342
is
AUD 66,341
This means that unless you can find a taxi driver who is willing to work for AUD 16,341, then the point of the Tesla Cybercab is proven. The Tesla Cybercab is purely designed to replace taxi drivers, with robots.
This makes a very very big assumption; that being that Tesla Motor Corp would have to allow other owners of their things to use their cars to earn money.
Remember, as it stands the current Cybercab offer is on a invite-only basis and explicitly for personal use only. Taxi companies, ride-hailing, delivery and rental use arrangements would require that Tesla Motor Corp change its current set of agreements. In other words, you would need Tesla Motor Corp's authorisation before you could even begin.
Then you would need to hope and pray that Tesla Motor Corp would remain to be a good faith keeper of the contract. This seems incredibly naive when you consider that Elon Musk personally ordered the shutdown of the satellite broadband internet service Starlink, because he accused accused Ukraine of violating its terms of service. What this says is that even if you buy a Cybercab, if Mr Musk has a dummy spit and throws his toys out the pram like a baby, then your investment is functionally worthless.
Maybe that is the point though?
Nobody really batted an eyelid when banks replaced people with ATMs, then branches with ATMs, then ATMs with nothing. Everyone huffed and puffed when supermarkets replaced people with automatic checkout machines. The weird thing is, we like that. We no longer have to look bank tellers or checkout operators in the eye and tell them that we think that they are subhuman garbage. Tesla Motor Corp likes it too. They long for a world where they tell all of us, that people are garbage and certainly not worth paying a wage for.
In the grand scheme of things, there isn't really such a thing as "the consumer" as an economic concept. In broad terms there are rich consumers, and then there are the rest. The rich are getting richer and they dominate consumption. Cybercab, just like ATMs and automatic checkout machines, is purely about selling services to the rich, at the expense of throwing labour into the garbage bin.
This makes X's algorithm and its guess that I might like to buy their new Cybercab all the more perplexing. I genuinely don't understand why it thinks I want one.
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