March 12, 2022

Horse 2984 - I Want To Boogie On The Disko Highway

When it comes to what is hip, happening and groovy, it is pretty obvious that I am neither hip, happening, groovy, or whatever it is that the kids on fleek are saying these days. In a recent meeting that we has with some clients, I honestly thought that 'Cardi B' referred to someone's cardigan and I wondered if they were the latest thing to come back around of the carousel of fashion. 'Cardi B' as it turns out, has nothing to do with knitwear.

While I am sitting here in my knitwear of irrelevance, let me discuss that great moment in music history "I Love The Nightlife (Disco Round)" by Alicia Bridges and came out in 1978.

Australians will probably remember this song slightly more than the rest of the world, as it kind of had an echo boom in popularity in 1992 when it was rereleased in conjunction with the film 'Priscilla: Queen Of The Desert'; which also came out that year. The remade film clip has Hugo Weaving in it apparently but I do not care to bother to look up either the film clip or the movie. I suppose that I could care less although I fail to see how.

The accounting firm which I work for, has an office which is directly above a hairdressers' shop. This means that I am involuntary subjected to listening to show tunes, songs from musicals, and selections such as 'I Love The Nightlife' because the people who work in the shop below, like that sort of thing. This song has been on high rotation of late and so I thought that I'd break it open and explore the meaning behind the song.

"I love the nightlife. I've got to boogie on the disco highway."

As someone who has recently been hit by a car and who has broken bones, my first thought was that boogying on the 'disco highway' is not advisable. With a bit of google-fu though, I can report that it might not be as ill-advised as I first thought.

A quick search on Google Maps reveals that there is no major thoroughfare with the name of 'Disco Highway'. Immediately this makes me think that Ms Bridges is playing in the land of metaphor but as I am neither hip, happening, or groovy, I thought that maybe there was a chance that I had made a spelling mistake.

The island of Disko is about 3km off the west coast of Greenland. It is a barren place and had a population of only 11 at the 2020 Census. The main road which runs through the town of Diskofijord which is de facto capital of Disko, is probably the best candidate for the title of 'Disko Highway' and it has even been visited Google Maps.

I have no idea if Alicia Bridges was aware of this island in 1978 but I am reasonably sure that a place with a population with less than a dozen, is unlikely to have a particularly vibrant nightlife. Although having said that, if it was a nice night outside and someone had a guitar, and there was a fire going, and there was fermented vegetable produce or even distilled fermented vegetable produce being imbibed by the locals, then I could very well be wrong. I tend to think though, that any trace of night life is likely to disappear once a core of about 6 people have decided to walk home and go to bed though.

Admittedly, as the Disko Highway appears to be a single lane road which mainly has foot traffic and the only motorised vehicles which are likely to travel along it are probably farm quad bikes, then it should be reasonably safe to boogie on the Disko Highway. A traffic jam would probably only happen is someone was moving cows from one field to another and this got in the way of someone on said quad bike. Ms Bridges boogying away in the middle of the road is unlikely to cause that much chaos to local traffic because they can just walk or ride around.

Assuming the remote possibility of any of this being true, I do not that Disko is well within the range where the Aurora Borealis can be seen in the northern skies and given that Diskofijord is such a small village, it is unlikely to throw up enough light pollution to cause a problem. Boogying on the Disko Highway might very well be an amazing experience, if you had a pair of headphones in and the northern lights were on full display.

The chance of any of this being true is near enough to zero as to be declared as such. Nevertheless, now that I have put this into the world, I bet that someone on the trillion monkeys with typewriters device that we call 'the internet' can probably make this happen. 

If someone wants to throw an unfeasible amount of money at me to make this happen, then I am prepared to accept the burden of cash however large and turn this into a project: to temporarily increase the population of Disko to 12, bring the nightlife and boogie... on the Disko Highway.

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