January 16, 2014

Horse 1593 - Devon

The county properly known as Devon (not Devonshire) is on what is most properly called "the pointy bit" on the southwest of Britain. Once you've reached pasty county, Cornwall, you've gone too far and it's time to turn around. 
Actually the western boundary with Cornwall was set as the River Tamar as long ago as 936 by King Æthelstan. Hopefully by 936, Æthelstan had learned how to make decent scones because his grandad Alfred the Great, burned the cakes. Maybe Æthelstan preferred making sandwiches, for it is roughly around his time that Devon became famous for suspicious meat products which according to the list of ingredients contain "Meat including Pork". 

Fun Fact 1: If you put Devon in a toaster, it expands. This is completely different from most meat which becomes smaller when cooked.
Fun Fact 2: If you were to go from Devon to Towcester, you would pass very close to the Silverstone Grand Prix circuit and Kingston Bagpuss
Fun Fact 3: If you were to put the county of Devon in a toaster, then the slot would only need to be about 75 miles across. I don't suggest it though as many parts of the county are highly flammable, such as the forests of the Mendip Hills.

Also located in the Mendip Hills was Britain's oldest complete human skeleton, called the Cheddar Man, after the area in which he was found, Cheddar Gorge. This particular formation is noteworthy as it is entirely made from cheese and comma though strangely...

Some of the most notable Devonians include Francis Drake who played lawn bowls, Walter Raleigh who invented the potato, Agatha Christie who popularised old ladies going around solving crimes and Chris Martin who invented whinging whilst singing songs and playing the guitar.

Devon is also presumed to be the birthplace of Bovine Spongiform Encephalopathy (BSE) which is more commonly known as Mad Cow Disease. This appears to have been first spotted in a breed of cow called the Red Devon; this also might help to explain the existence of above mentioned suspicious meat product which is named after the county.

Devon though is possibly most famous for the incorrectly named Devonshire Tea which includes tea, scones, jam and cream, or maybe tea, scones, cream and jam. Is it jam first and then cream? Or is it cream first and then jam? There's only one way to decide this...


No comments: