The problem with listicles is that they are really bad for your brain. A listicle has no other purpose than to drive and generate traffic for the website in question. It is a kind of tnetennba, if you will. For this reason, as far as the end user is concerned, they appear to be of low effort. While that might be true if the list only contains ten things, the cognitive load on the author more than doubles for twenty items and when it comes to 56 items as is the case here, suddenly the author find themself spiralling into a vortex of obsession.
This list, which is now the official Rollo Chocolate Bar ratings index, is one such spiral into the vortex as time begins to cease to have any meaning during Lockdown II: Electric Boogaloo. The RCB for 2021 is by no means exhaustive, by no means fixed, and by no means sensible. Please note that it is subject to change, on an arbitrary whim and at any given point in time with no explanation whatsoever.
A1 - Rolls Royce Tier
1. Nestle Yorkie Mystery
2. Nestle Yorkie Original
2. Nestle Yorkie Rum And Raisin
4. Nestle Yorkie Fruit And Biscuit
5. Nestle Club
6. Cadbury Old Gold
B1 - Extremely Fine
7. Nestle Club Rum And Raisin
8. Cadbury Old Gold Rum And Raisin
9. Nestle Club Fruit And Nut
10. Cadbury Old Gold Fruit And Nut
11. Nestle Club Caramel
12. Cadbury Old Gold Caramel
13. Whittaker's Peanut Slab
14. Fry's Turkish Delight
B2 - Very Fine
15. Whittaker's Milk
16. Nestle Milk
17. Cadbury Dairy Milk
B3 - Fine
18. Cadbury Dairy Milk Caramel
19. Cadbury Dairy Milk Pineapple
20. Cadbury Dairy Milk Strawberry
21. Cadbury Top Deck
22. Cadbury Dairy Milk Turkish Delight
23. Cadbury Dairy Milk Raspberry
24. Cadbury Dairy Milk Peppermint
25. Cadbury Dairy Milk Hazelnut
C1 - Fair
26. 3 Musketeers
27. Dreamy (Aldi)
28. Milky Way (Australia)
C2 - Adequate
29. Moro
30. Mars
31. Milky Way (US)
32. Chokito
33. Snickers
34. Picnic
35. Boost
36. Nestle Crunch
37. Polly Waffle
C3 - Acceptable
38. Violet Crumble
39. Crunchie
40. Aero
41. Flake
42. Twirl
D - Junk Rated. Please see me after class.
43. Take 5
44. Milky Bar (all varieties)
45. Hershey's Cookies and Cream
E - Banned From The Mickey Mouse Club Tier
46. Cadbury Marvellous Creations
47. Cadbury Popcorn
48. Reece's Pieces
49. Reece's Peanut Butter Cup
50. Mr Goodbar
51. Butterfinger
52. Curly Wurly
F - Cat Vomit Tier
53. Whittaker's Kiwifruit
54. Cadbury Vegemite
55. Hershey's Milk
56. Hershey's Kisses
In general, everything arranged by the letter categories has remained in those places for a very long time. It should also be noted that although items in Category F are edible, they thoroughly deserve their ranking and that there are clearly better options. Items in Category A are excellent and will result in genuine delight if offered as a present.
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