May 29, 2007

Horse 765 - Stupidity Can Not Be Killed

Stupidity can not be killed with these things:

Air freshener, fire, anti-matter, axes, black holes, butter knives, chain mail, chainsaws, the Death Star, diarrhea, fire, flying monkeys with wings, guns, lances, lasers, light sabers, martial arts, mouse traps, nukes, bigger nukes, paper cuts, shoulder blades, swords, toothpicks, weapons of mass destruction, the Oxford English Dictionary, any sweet or sour foodstuffs, cheesy poofs, cheese dippers, croissants, cows with guns, chickens in choppers, egg cups, methanol, ethanol, fruit, a frozen loaf of bread, girl scout cookies, guinea pigs, kittens, mayo (or any type of condiment), the Mayo (or any type of condiment) Clinic, any meat in the form of a ball (or loaf, for that matter), oranges, a pig in a blender, Pepto-Bismol, pi, pie, potatoes, pretzels, puppies, rabbit detectives, salad bowls, salad bowels, swedish meatballs, Trix, Al Gore, Freddy Mercury, Tony Blair, Austin Powers, Barney, Barney Rubble, rubble, The Hamburglar, Ben Affleck, Benji, Bill Clinton, Bobby, Bob, Bob Saget, Bob Sherman, Bob the Builder, Captain America, Captain Britain, Captain Canada, Captain Crunch, Captain Falcon, Captain Marvel, Captain Oblivious, Captain Planet, Captain Scarlet, Captain Ultra, Chris Rock, Dr. Evil, Dr. Evil's Henchmen, the Dark Lord Voldemort, Dick Cheney, Fancy Dan, George Bush, Godzilla, the Nissan Skyline GTR, Jack Sparrow, Jack Thompson, Jeff Probst, Marcel Proust, Maozilla, MC Hammer, Rick James, SpongeBob SquarePants, or pants in general, Steven Segal, Tom Clancy, Tom from Myspace, the Amazing Spiderman, The Black, Red, Yellow, White, Blue, or Brown Man Group, the Incredible Hulk, the ATO, Vanilla Ice, vanilla slice, you, your bladder (even with the spleen to help it), your mom, "your momma so fat" jokes, 50 Cent, Stalin, two cows, milk, the Soviet Space Navy, Cosmonants, Karl Marx, wheelbarrows, Communism, ninjas (unless they're Jewish), pirates (unless they're scented), Ninja-Pirates or any combination thereof (unless they're Jewish and scented), The Ninja-Pirate Assembly, the Anti-Ninja Organisation, the Anti-Pirate Organisation, the Anti-Pirate-Ninja Organisation, the Anti-Ninja-Pirate Assembly of South Africa, minjas, samurais, Asian people, Canadians, Germans, Russians, athiests, berserkers (not to be confused w/ berzerkrs), berzerkrs, blind people, Democrats, dentists, emos, screamos, small stick men with sharp pointy sticks, gangstas, men who fall out with their wives and wander the streets at night, nazis, n00bz, playboys, playgirls, preps, props, pyromaniacs, terrorists, fat people, bald people, deaf, dumb and blind kids who sure play a mean pinball, vampires (excepting Alucard.) zombies, consonants, giant fishes in bear suits attackin’ Tokyo (unless during Easter Holiday), guilt-tripping, hairy lizards, Heath Ledger, I Love Lucy, iPods, kindness, linear equations, L’oreal Kids shampoo, shea butter lotion, titanium toilet paper, the easy button, the system, the Force, the Schwartz, The Game, The Offspring, twelve year olds invading the internet, medical degrees, Nazi Bananas, Nigerian internet scams, paradoxes, Pikachu, scented candles, scented pikachus, pirahras, or white-out.

I'll expect this list to have been memorised by 9pm this evening... or else.