February 23, 2009

Horse 961 - Super Powers

As an illustration in church last night we were asked about our favourite super heroes. Now I must confess that I never really saw the point of someone who wears their underpants on the outside then expecting me to take them seriously. Honestly, if I saw Spiderman coming down the street I'd either think that he was an Olympic Cyclist who'd lost his bicycle (because there's simply no other excuse for all that lycra) or more likely that he was both a mental patient and/or a pratt.

Superman for instance fights for "Truth, Justice and the American Way". Is this truth and justice as represented by the American in similar terms to what we saw at Guantanamo Bay? I don't really want that sort of truth or justice thank you. Perhaps we should look at the example of some other super hero, say... Batman.

Batman's superpower is... cash. The sad truth is that despite the impossibly cool ugly car, the stupid get up, Batman is little more than a rich idiot with no day job. Admittedly he's head of Wayne Industries which under any other circumstances would have made him a corporate executive and thus the bad guy, but somehow we're supposed to feel sorry for him because he lost his parents despite the fact that 90% of all angsty characters in film suffer the same fate.
Hint: If you're in a film, don't be a parent because you'll be killed off for the reasons of dramatic tension.

If I was to be a super hero then I should think that I'd want my own superpower... the Soviet Union perhaps? Well it was a super power and to be fair Leonid Brezhnev was awarded the honour of the Hero of the Soviet Union four times. That has to count for something, right? If not, than at least it could be said that Brezhnev had some of the best eyebrows the world has ever seen.

Gotta love those eyebrows.

In Soviet Russia, the Party finds YOU!

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