Horse 1018 - How Much We Like/Hate Your Club

I have this theory that suggests that the more successful a club is, the more hated that club is likely to be. It usually follows that hate follows success.

So then I have complied a highly non-scientific method of determining how much people are likely to hate any given club, or alternatively, how much people are likely to like any given club if they are a neutral.

To this end I give you The Great Premier League Likability Index:

This handy guide will give you an empirical guide to how much people are going to like your team. By following these handy little instructions, we'll work out scores for the entire premier league.

Supporter Base:
- Add 1 point for every year your club has been in the top flight. Because a club's following is built on how long they survive. It follows that a club with a long standing should generate a loyal following.
- Add 3 points if they have just been promoted. A club which is only newly promoted has a small boost as people tend to look favourably on the newbies.

Snobbery Value:
- Deduct 2 points for every £100m the club is worth. Nobody likes a bunch of rich snobs who think they can buy a title.
- Add 1 point for every thousand seats that the club stadium has under 100,000. Big stadia although can pack more people in, tend not to have supporters from that city.

People Hate Success:
- Deduct 2 points for every piece of silverware that the club has won in the past 20 years.
- Add 1 point for every year that the club has won diddly squat.

Nationalistic Fervour:
- Add 1 point for every English, Scottish, Welsh, Irish (incl. NI) or Australian international in the squad.
- Deduct 1 point for every German, Italian, Spanish, Portugese, Brazillian, or Argentine international in the squad.

Colour is Important:
- Deduct 5 points if the club plays in Red or Blue at home
- Deduct 3 points if the club plays in White at home
- Add 5 points if the club plays in any other colour at home

If we apply all of these then we get the following values:

221 Stoke City
190 Hull City
141 Burnley
134 Everton
132 Bolton Wanderers
117 Fulham
112 Aston Villa
107 West Ham Utd
104 Wolverhampton
97 Sunderland
94 Birmingham City
92 Manchester City
91 Tottenham
87 Blackburn Rovers
87 Portsmouth
87 Wigan Ath
78 Arsenal
37 Chelsea
33 Liverpool
-55 Manchester Utd

Not surprisingly, Manchester Utd is the most hated of clubs because it is a) the most successful, b) the richest, c) has a massive stadium, from which we conclude that the supporters aren't from Manchester and d) is the least English of football clubs.

What I find interesting is that Aston Villa, Everton, Bolton, Fulham and West Ham which have been bouncing around the doldrums for the past 10 years have a good core of ex-England players but aren't really all that successful with them.

Blackburn, Portsmouth and Wigan are all not very English, but at the same time have between them won a score of trophies.

Stoke City would be a neutral's favourite, mainly because they embody the underdog. They've never won anything, they play out of a tiny stadium and they have a few Scotland players. They'll probably get relegated, but everyone loves willing on the underdog, right?