This would be a good name for a rock band or even a television production company but this is neither.
Patent on Insanity
News reporters may or may not have picked up on this but it appears as though Nintendo Corporation may have patented a game concept - Insanity. The patent seems to suggest that the algorithm will generate weirdness depending on how sane the player's character is.
Abstract
A video game and game system incorporating a game character's sanity level that is affected by occurrences in the game such as encountering a game creature or gruesome situation. A character's sanity level is modified by an amount determined based on a character reaction to the occurrence such as taking a rest or slowing game progress and/or an amount of character preparation. That is, if a character is prepared for the particular occurrence, the occurrence may have little or no affect on the character's sanity level. As the character's sanity level decreases, game play is effected such as by controlling game effects, audio effects, creating hallucinations and the like. In this context. the same game can be played differently each time it is played.
That is if the player sees something which they haven't seen before, the level of insanity will change depending on how prepared they are to meet the challenge.
There is one slight problem to this; I don't think you can quanititively measure in real-life how sane or insane a person actually is. Sanity at law is the ability of a person to take responsibility for their actions. Often you'll see things defined as being of sound mind which would therefore be the absence of some legal incapacitation.
Should there even be a game which make use of a characters mental illness? Surely this should be condsidered crass and ignoble. In some views, what is insane by mainstream definitions is not necessarily a disorder of the mind, but may simply be a different way of being that is judged as unacceptable on social or cultural grounds.
I think the idea is misplaced and perhaps is confused with people's reaction to terror or perhaps some form of psychosis. Moreover, I often wonder why people actually want to patent something like this.
August 31, 2005
Horse 393 - Why Intelligent Design Sucks
If you're asleep in bed on a chilly morning (like now) , your bladder will shrink in order to conserve the amount of heat being lost in urine production. Big mistake - for when the bladder shinks it creates a situation whereby you need to go even quicker, even if youtry to stay warm under the covers and you certainly can't do it in there.
Since the human body produces roughly 1mL of urine every minute, then that's about 240mL over the course of a night time which is when it's colder which is also when the bladder shrinks. Also since the average capacity of most people's bladders under normal circumstances is 400mL and in the shrunk state can be as little as 200mL, then invariably you'll have to get up and go to the lav at some point.
Is this proof that Intelligent Design sucks? I think so, either that or it is in fact a very strange joke being played on us. Whatever the case, I need to go now and it's just past 3am... drat!
Since the human body produces roughly 1mL of urine every minute, then that's about 240mL over the course of a night time which is when it's colder which is also when the bladder shrinks. Also since the average capacity of most people's bladders under normal circumstances is 400mL and in the shrunk state can be as little as 200mL, then invariably you'll have to get up and go to the lav at some point.
Is this proof that Intelligent Design sucks? I think so, either that or it is in fact a very strange joke being played on us. Whatever the case, I need to go now and it's just past 3am... drat!
August 29, 2005
Horse 392 - I'm A Metric Man, Every Inch Of The Way
The USA and Britain are holding out against the rest of the world, trying to stop a scourge of terror desprately scratching at their doorstep. I refer to that most gross stench of foul horror that is... The Metric System.
The Imperial measurement system was based on useful things that normal people use. A pound of cheese, or sausages, or butter is a nice tactile amount of stuff. The Pound Sterling derives its value originally from exactly what is says it does, that is one Pound of Sterling silver or 925 fine.
A pint is also incredbly useful. A pint of milk is what you'd expect the milko to leave on your doorstep. A pint of HP Sauce ensures that there's enough for everyone and who doesn't enjoy sinking a few pints at the local with your mates?
Lengthwise, a inch is nice and small, a foot will handle things like door heights and ceiling heights, a furlong although a bit archaic is perfect for counting out horse tracks and the mile is ubiquitous for measuring large distances. One always refers to mileage and not kilometerage.
So then could someone please explain the mystery that is the tyres on my Ka? They read 165/65 R13 which means that they're 165mm across with an aspect ratio of 65% but with 13 inch rims.
Er?
The nuts holding the wheel on are a 19mm socket which standard imperial automotive threads.
Er?
Ah yes, the metric system. Trust the French to invent something so unuseful then impose it on the world. BOO!
The Imperial measurement system was based on useful things that normal people use. A pound of cheese, or sausages, or butter is a nice tactile amount of stuff. The Pound Sterling derives its value originally from exactly what is says it does, that is one Pound of Sterling silver or 925 fine.
A pint is also incredbly useful. A pint of milk is what you'd expect the milko to leave on your doorstep. A pint of HP Sauce ensures that there's enough for everyone and who doesn't enjoy sinking a few pints at the local with your mates?
Lengthwise, a inch is nice and small, a foot will handle things like door heights and ceiling heights, a furlong although a bit archaic is perfect for counting out horse tracks and the mile is ubiquitous for measuring large distances. One always refers to mileage and not kilometerage.
So then could someone please explain the mystery that is the tyres on my Ka? They read 165/65 R13 which means that they're 165mm across with an aspect ratio of 65% but with 13 inch rims.
Er?
The nuts holding the wheel on are a 19mm socket which standard imperial automotive threads.
Er?
Ah yes, the metric system. Trust the French to invent something so unuseful then impose it on the world. BOO!
August 26, 2005
iFive - 26th Aug
I noticed two very strange thing about the iPod in general this week. Firstly, I'm now running iTrip which is an FM transmitter. Very cool in the Ka I must admit but it's prone to generating dud frequencies and burst frequencies. Also, iTunes doesn't seem to worry if the date and time on the iPod aren't accurate, it seems to generate it's own figures based on the computers clock relative to the last play rather than the data from iPod.
As an aside I've noticed a skew in the general stats and I think it says something more about me than the iPod. Every single track of less than 1 min duration (which includes all ads and promos) has been played now. Maybe this shows impatience on my part?
1. Why Can't I Sing Like A Girl? - They Might Be Giants
2. Parliamentary Perks - Sam Kekovich
3. 1982 The Golden Hour - Radio 1
4. Nugget - Cake
5. It's Only Love - The Beatles
As an aside I've noticed a skew in the general stats and I think it says something more about me than the iPod. Every single track of less than 1 min duration (which includes all ads and promos) has been played now. Maybe this shows impatience on my part?
1. Why Can't I Sing Like A Girl? - They Might Be Giants
2. Parliamentary Perks - Sam Kekovich
3. 1982 The Golden Hour - Radio 1
4. Nugget - Cake
5. It's Only Love - The Beatles
August 24, 2005
Horse 391 - Dib Dib Dib
A couple of quotes to start today:
"Would you rather have butter or guns? Preparedness makes us powerful. Butter merely makes us fat." - Hermann Goering
I first read this on the inside cover of The Fat of the Land by The Prodigy; thought it was pretty cool and left it at that. I later found out by accident that Goering had said it at a rather big rally before the German war machine swung into action.
"They will attack every defence we have, and to last and not conceed we must above all be prepared" - Jimmy Hogan
Aston Villa had never had a manager or a coach before the 1936/7 season, after a punishing defeat in in the league at the hands of Arsenal when they lost 1-7, Jimmy Hogan was appointed as overseer. It was his principles of sound defence which saw Villa slowly become one of the blue-chips of English football.
"Be Prepared" - The Scout Motto.
We live in a world of uncertainty, moreover we live in a world that is more than ready to tear down everything that it doesn't like. I have never been a Scout but their motto is quite sound: be ready for anything.
Think about it, the world we live in is dying (this is pretty well much self-evident) yet somehow Christians are able to be more grounded, happier and even dare I say joyous in the storms of life. We have something valuable, something which the world doesn't like.
As Christians we're very much open to attack, our lifestyle may very well elicit the why, what and how questions from our Non-Christian friends. Why are we different? What is the source of our strength and hope? How can they experience what we experience?
"Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect"
- 1 Peter 3:15
The answer to all three types of questions of How, Why, and What, is (get ready for the two most important words in the bible) Jesus and the Gospel. Duh, even 6 year olds learn this in Sunday School.Hear me out here. Jesus is the difference maker; he's our Savior, Guide and Leader. And his message, the gospel, has the power to save us and keep us close to God. That being the case, we need to have a solid and increasingly greater grasp of the Good News. We need to review the basics every day and claim its power. We never outgrow our need for the gospel. More importantly, the world that doesn't like the gospel needs to be told the how, why and what. They demand the answers (sometimes not very nicely) so we should be prepared to give them.
"Would you rather have butter or guns? Preparedness makes us powerful. Butter merely makes us fat." - Hermann Goering
I first read this on the inside cover of The Fat of the Land by The Prodigy; thought it was pretty cool and left it at that. I later found out by accident that Goering had said it at a rather big rally before the German war machine swung into action.
"They will attack every defence we have, and to last and not conceed we must above all be prepared" - Jimmy Hogan
Aston Villa had never had a manager or a coach before the 1936/7 season, after a punishing defeat in in the league at the hands of Arsenal when they lost 1-7, Jimmy Hogan was appointed as overseer. It was his principles of sound defence which saw Villa slowly become one of the blue-chips of English football.
"Be Prepared" - The Scout Motto.
We live in a world of uncertainty, moreover we live in a world that is more than ready to tear down everything that it doesn't like. I have never been a Scout but their motto is quite sound: be ready for anything.
Think about it, the world we live in is dying (this is pretty well much self-evident) yet somehow Christians are able to be more grounded, happier and even dare I say joyous in the storms of life. We have something valuable, something which the world doesn't like.
As Christians we're very much open to attack, our lifestyle may very well elicit the why, what and how questions from our Non-Christian friends. Why are we different? What is the source of our strength and hope? How can they experience what we experience?
"Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect"
- 1 Peter 3:15
The answer to all three types of questions of How, Why, and What, is (get ready for the two most important words in the bible) Jesus and the Gospel. Duh, even 6 year olds learn this in Sunday School.Hear me out here. Jesus is the difference maker; he's our Savior, Guide and Leader. And his message, the gospel, has the power to save us and keep us close to God. That being the case, we need to have a solid and increasingly greater grasp of the Good News. We need to review the basics every day and claim its power. We never outgrow our need for the gospel. More importantly, the world that doesn't like the gospel needs to be told the how, why and what. They demand the answers (sometimes not very nicely) so we should be prepared to give them.
August 22, 2005
Horse 390 - Que Sera Sera
Multiplex "The Well Built Australian" doesn't appear to be all that well heeled. Multiplex as the builders on the very very late running Wembley Stadium posted a A$62m loss.
The stadium scheme has been hit by delays and cost-blowouts, although Multiplex said it was likely to hand the stadium over to the FA by the end of March 2006. It is under pressure to complete the scheme in time so preparations can begin for the FA Cup Final, which takes place in May.
It means for the first time since 2000, the Cup Final will be held in the spritual home of football.
Originally known as the Empire Stadium, it was built for the British Empire Exhibition of 1924.
What was really distressing was that there were no plans to save the famous Twin Towers.
The destruction of the Twin Towers was possibly the saddest day in football history; the ground had earnt it's status with the first ever match there - the White Horse Cup final of 1923 when 200,000 people squeezed into the stadium and were kept under control by a single policeman and his horse Billie (Bolton 2 - West Ham Utd 0).
Even the great Pelé said that "Wembley is the church of football. It is the capital of football and it is the heart of football". I only hope that when it re-opens, it will begin to take up the place that the old stadium had. As sung by crowds all over England, once again the song will ring true...
Que Sera Sera,
Whatever will be will be,
We're going to Wembley!
Que Sera Sera!
The stadium scheme has been hit by delays and cost-blowouts, although Multiplex said it was likely to hand the stadium over to the FA by the end of March 2006. It is under pressure to complete the scheme in time so preparations can begin for the FA Cup Final, which takes place in May.
It means for the first time since 2000, the Cup Final will be held in the spritual home of football.
Originally known as the Empire Stadium, it was built for the British Empire Exhibition of 1924.
What was really distressing was that there were no plans to save the famous Twin Towers.
The destruction of the Twin Towers was possibly the saddest day in football history; the ground had earnt it's status with the first ever match there - the White Horse Cup final of 1923 when 200,000 people squeezed into the stadium and were kept under control by a single policeman and his horse Billie (Bolton 2 - West Ham Utd 0).
Even the great Pelé said that "Wembley is the church of football. It is the capital of football and it is the heart of football". I only hope that when it re-opens, it will begin to take up the place that the old stadium had. As sung by crowds all over England, once again the song will ring true...
Que Sera Sera,
Whatever will be will be,
We're going to Wembley!
Que Sera Sera!
August 21, 2005
Horse 389 - A Bit of Crap
If you covered your body in shark poo then went swimming in the ocean would a shark then bite you? Similarly, if you rolled around in bear crap then strolled through the woods, would a bear attack you? I honestly doubt any animal would eat its own scat. I know pigs and some animals like to sleep in their own poo but I don't think they would eat it. Could we then assume an animal's poo might be a repellent against them?
I often ponder the real important stuff and come up with, what I think are very real conundrums. Like the ocean. It is inhabited by a lot of creatures and all of these creatures eat, so with that in mind, all these creatures must by logic take a dump. Where does all that sea creature crap go? Is the ocean one big toilet? What the hell does a dolphin's crap look like? Do some creatures mistake floating crap as another creature they might like to eat?
I can see some bottom dwelling creature hiding in a cave waiting for a smaller creature to come along so he can grab it and eat it, when a few dolphins swim by and one does a poo which floats down toward the bottom of the ocean. The bottom dweller sees it and thinks, "cool I think it's a sea cucumber". He dashes out and grabs it and takes a huge bite out of it. "Eeeeeeewwwwwww" he spits it back out and goes "It's a dolphin poo, that's awful!".
I for one think David Attenborough or Jacques Cousteau should do a wild life documentary on the toilet habits of ocean dwellers. It would be riveting viewing and would answer a lot of questions.
Elephants do huge craps but whales are four or five times bigger then them, so this leads me to believe whales must do enormous craps. Why don't we see whale poo wash up on a beach? The damn things must be as big as a small family car. Do jellyfish do clear, transparent poop?
Bigger sea creatures eat smaller ones and I swear if I was a smaller one and about to be eaten, I'd push a poo half way out my butt so it was just hanging there. That should put the bigger creature off eating me, I can imagine him thinking "Ewwwwwwww i'm not eating that".
Another question that puzzles me is, do sea creatures fart? Dolphins are supposedly intelligent and playful. When you have a group of young male dolphins playing together do they swim into the middle of the group and let a fart go as a joke? I can see all his friends going "Yeah yeah good one Flipper, that's gross man".
Considering all of this I don't think animals use crap to their advantage. I think an antelope out of the plains of Africa could use crap to make a lion think twice about eating him. Picture this if you will, an antelope grazing on the plains when he notices a lion stalking his butt. He thinks to himself "So Mr Lion, you think you want to eat me huh?". He then goes and rolls in a big old elephant poo and covers his entire body in it then stands there looking at the lion and goes "There ya go Mr Lion wanna eat me now?".
I can just imagine it, a brand of shark repellant spray that smells like shark poo. Guaranteed to keep you wet and smelly for up to 24 hours.
I often ponder the real important stuff and come up with, what I think are very real conundrums. Like the ocean. It is inhabited by a lot of creatures and all of these creatures eat, so with that in mind, all these creatures must by logic take a dump. Where does all that sea creature crap go? Is the ocean one big toilet? What the hell does a dolphin's crap look like? Do some creatures mistake floating crap as another creature they might like to eat?
I can see some bottom dwelling creature hiding in a cave waiting for a smaller creature to come along so he can grab it and eat it, when a few dolphins swim by and one does a poo which floats down toward the bottom of the ocean. The bottom dweller sees it and thinks, "cool I think it's a sea cucumber". He dashes out and grabs it and takes a huge bite out of it. "Eeeeeeewwwwwww" he spits it back out and goes "It's a dolphin poo, that's awful!".
I for one think David Attenborough or Jacques Cousteau should do a wild life documentary on the toilet habits of ocean dwellers. It would be riveting viewing and would answer a lot of questions.
Elephants do huge craps but whales are four or five times bigger then them, so this leads me to believe whales must do enormous craps. Why don't we see whale poo wash up on a beach? The damn things must be as big as a small family car. Do jellyfish do clear, transparent poop?
Bigger sea creatures eat smaller ones and I swear if I was a smaller one and about to be eaten, I'd push a poo half way out my butt so it was just hanging there. That should put the bigger creature off eating me, I can imagine him thinking "Ewwwwwwww i'm not eating that".
Another question that puzzles me is, do sea creatures fart? Dolphins are supposedly intelligent and playful. When you have a group of young male dolphins playing together do they swim into the middle of the group and let a fart go as a joke? I can see all his friends going "Yeah yeah good one Flipper, that's gross man".
Considering all of this I don't think animals use crap to their advantage. I think an antelope out of the plains of Africa could use crap to make a lion think twice about eating him. Picture this if you will, an antelope grazing on the plains when he notices a lion stalking his butt. He thinks to himself "So Mr Lion, you think you want to eat me huh?". He then goes and rolls in a big old elephant poo and covers his entire body in it then stands there looking at the lion and goes "There ya go Mr Lion wanna eat me now?".
I can just imagine it, a brand of shark repellant spray that smells like shark poo. Guaranteed to keep you wet and smelly for up to 24 hours.
August 19, 2005
Horse 388 - When Two Tribes Go To War
If you've been watching telly for the last few weeks you'll have noticed a bitter advertising campaign by the two main warring factions of accountants - the CPA's and the ACA. Now it's all very well that an advertising campaign informs people of your business, and perhaps it's appropriate that given the end of the financial year in June that they should appear now but it all seems to be a bit pointed.
As an accountant I can tell you that from a professional standpoint it matters not which group you come from at all in the real world. Most businesses only care if you can do the job, in fact most don't even care if you can do the job until they need their annual taxation returns done.
Given the sorts of people who are accountants, this sits well. In general accountants are incredibly nerdy. The image of someone with glasses, buck teeth, a pocket protector (though I don't even know where you could find one for sale anymore) and the standard white shirt and bad haircut is not that far removed from the mark.
I bet that in the board rooms of the professional organisations, there are copies of Bill Gates and Dwayne Dibley the Duke of Dork battling it out across long tables with 17th century pewter soldiers saying things like "I'm going to take over the world of modified capital gains and contra trading, that'll show 'em".
Accountants are the Warhammer 40K of the business world. A club so tightly knit that it's like Willy Wonka's chocolate factory "No-one ever goes in, and no-one ever come out" or should that be two clubs... two clubs* of NERDS!
*Two of Clubs ranks only below 2 of Spades and Hearts.
As an accountant I can tell you that from a professional standpoint it matters not which group you come from at all in the real world. Most businesses only care if you can do the job, in fact most don't even care if you can do the job until they need their annual taxation returns done.
Given the sorts of people who are accountants, this sits well. In general accountants are incredibly nerdy. The image of someone with glasses, buck teeth, a pocket protector (though I don't even know where you could find one for sale anymore) and the standard white shirt and bad haircut is not that far removed from the mark.
I bet that in the board rooms of the professional organisations, there are copies of Bill Gates and Dwayne Dibley the Duke of Dork battling it out across long tables with 17th century pewter soldiers saying things like "I'm going to take over the world of modified capital gains and contra trading, that'll show 'em".
Accountants are the Warhammer 40K of the business world. A club so tightly knit that it's like Willy Wonka's chocolate factory "No-one ever goes in, and no-one ever come out" or should that be two clubs... two clubs* of NERDS!
*Two of Clubs ranks only below 2 of Spades and Hearts.
August 16, 2005
Horse 387 - Can You Lick Your Elbow?
A popular urban myth is that people can't lick their elbows. Whilst this may be true for the vast majority, there are a few exceptional people who can achieve such a feat.
One such person is named Jessica and works at the Commonwealth Bank on the other side of the street from where I work. Now this might not exactly be the most useful story or ability in the world (and really I have no idea of how this topic of conversation arose) but it truly looks quite bizarre.
I can't manage to do this and in one one those rare moments while my guard was down, out came the camera on her cell-phone and snap, there's a photo of me looking like a complete git.
I have subsequently learned that this can be used as an icebreaker in a social group. Tell people to say the word "Strawberries" while they lick their own elbow, having subsequently tested this (on gullible people) people can be made to look more of a git than I did.
Now this story (apart from being delightfully pointless) has another moment that I must say, quite frankly weirded me out. During one of the attempts of my trying to look a pratt licking my elbow (and the last), she sucessfully weirded me out by licking my elbow for me... salacious little lady.
One such person is named Jessica and works at the Commonwealth Bank on the other side of the street from where I work. Now this might not exactly be the most useful story or ability in the world (and really I have no idea of how this topic of conversation arose) but it truly looks quite bizarre.
I can't manage to do this and in one one those rare moments while my guard was down, out came the camera on her cell-phone and snap, there's a photo of me looking like a complete git.
I have subsequently learned that this can be used as an icebreaker in a social group. Tell people to say the word "Strawberries" while they lick their own elbow, having subsequently tested this (on gullible people) people can be made to look more of a git than I did.
Now this story (apart from being delightfully pointless) has another moment that I must say, quite frankly weirded me out. During one of the attempts of my trying to look a pratt licking my elbow (and the last), she sucessfully weirded me out by licking my elbow for me... salacious little lady.
August 13, 2005
Horse 386 (compy) - Wee-Wee In Space!
Picture this, the USSR had got the jump on the Americans during the space race. Sputnik 1 was the first artificial satellite in space and this four pound little bleeping ball threatened the free world. It would have been enough for the Americans to wee themselves, well guess what, it was.
Passing through people's kidney's every hour is one third of your body weight in water.
Consequently as a waste disposal system they work extremely well and generate 1ml of urine a minute. It's a well known fact that in cold weather, one's bladder shinks, also under pressure the bladder is squeezed meaning that you're more likely to go to the toilet in a wetsuit than if you were just swimming. Now multiply that by about 3 hours and put a person in such conditions into a space capsule.
The Freedom 7 flight of Alan Shepherd was delayed due to inclement weather. So for three hours, the spacecraft was held on the launch pad. Three hours in a cold environment that would prove to be hillarous.
With only 15 minutes to go, it was necessary to hold the count again to make a final check of the real-time trajectory computer. A small electrical part had a problem and this resulted in another hour and twenty six minute delay. Shepard was on top of the Redstone rocket for so long now that he had to urinate. "Gordo!" he said, talking to Gordon Cooper, a fellow Mercury Seven astronaut and principal prelaunch communicator. "Go, Alan." "Man, I got to pee." "You what?" "You heard me. I've got to pee. I've been up here forever."
Shepard wanted to be let out but there wasn't time to let him out and then reassemble the spacecraft and connect it all up. Thinking that he could be up there for hours, he told them he was going to do it in his suit. Unfortunately, there was no urine collection system and the medics were concerned he would short-circuit the leads. "Tell 'em to turn the power off!" Alan snapped. Cooper, with a chuckle in his voice said, "Okay, Alan. Power's off. Go to it."
Shepard couldn't hold back any longer and the liquid pooled in the small of his back. The medicos went psycho as they couldn't understand the bizarre readings they were getting, they honestly thought he had died or was introuble before someone at mission control told them. Soon, his heavy gauge magic underpants and undergarments soaked up the urine, and with 100 percent oxygen flowing through the suit he was soon dry. The countdown resumed.
At T- minus two minutes and forty seconds and counting, Shepard heard that dreaded word again, "Hold". There was a little computer problem. Getting frustrated, he yelled, "I've been in here more than three hours. I'm a hell of a lot cooler than you guys. Why don't you just fix your little problem and light this candle?"
Wee-wee went into space on that first flight, and they learnt very very quickly what we all know. Did you go before you went?
Wee-wee-wee all the way home.
Passing through people's kidney's every hour is one third of your body weight in water.
Consequently as a waste disposal system they work extremely well and generate 1ml of urine a minute. It's a well known fact that in cold weather, one's bladder shinks, also under pressure the bladder is squeezed meaning that you're more likely to go to the toilet in a wetsuit than if you were just swimming. Now multiply that by about 3 hours and put a person in such conditions into a space capsule.
The Freedom 7 flight of Alan Shepherd was delayed due to inclement weather. So for three hours, the spacecraft was held on the launch pad. Three hours in a cold environment that would prove to be hillarous.
With only 15 minutes to go, it was necessary to hold the count again to make a final check of the real-time trajectory computer. A small electrical part had a problem and this resulted in another hour and twenty six minute delay. Shepard was on top of the Redstone rocket for so long now that he had to urinate. "Gordo!" he said, talking to Gordon Cooper, a fellow Mercury Seven astronaut and principal prelaunch communicator. "Go, Alan." "Man, I got to pee." "You what?" "You heard me. I've got to pee. I've been up here forever."
Shepard wanted to be let out but there wasn't time to let him out and then reassemble the spacecraft and connect it all up. Thinking that he could be up there for hours, he told them he was going to do it in his suit. Unfortunately, there was no urine collection system and the medics were concerned he would short-circuit the leads. "Tell 'em to turn the power off!" Alan snapped. Cooper, with a chuckle in his voice said, "Okay, Alan. Power's off. Go to it."
Shepard couldn't hold back any longer and the liquid pooled in the small of his back. The medicos went psycho as they couldn't understand the bizarre readings they were getting, they honestly thought he had died or was introuble before someone at mission control told them. Soon, his heavy gauge magic underpants and undergarments soaked up the urine, and with 100 percent oxygen flowing through the suit he was soon dry. The countdown resumed.
At T- minus two minutes and forty seconds and counting, Shepard heard that dreaded word again, "Hold". There was a little computer problem. Getting frustrated, he yelled, "I've been in here more than three hours. I'm a hell of a lot cooler than you guys. Why don't you just fix your little problem and light this candle?"
Wee-wee went into space on that first flight, and they learnt very very quickly what we all know. Did you go before you went?
Wee-wee-wee all the way home.
August 12, 2005
iFive - 12th Aug
Pennywise. What am I doing with a song like this? Well I don't usually buy pub-punk and this is, but the only reason I bought the single (don't even know what it was) was for this B-Side.
Ska and Punk tends to have more of a play with existing songs and formats than mainstream pop; for this reason, gems like this never get airplay on commercial stations. In fact I think I heard it as a Superrequest on the J's before I bought the single (whatever it was).
1. 2003 Chris Moyles Saved Breakfast - Radio 1
2. Carry Us All - Oasis
3. If I Fell - The Beatles
4. You Get What You Give - New Radicals
5. I Get Around - Pennywise
Ska and Punk tends to have more of a play with existing songs and formats than mainstream pop; for this reason, gems like this never get airplay on commercial stations. In fact I think I heard it as a Superrequest on the J's before I bought the single (whatever it was).
1. 2003 Chris Moyles Saved Breakfast - Radio 1
2. Carry Us All - Oasis
3. If I Fell - The Beatles
4. You Get What You Give - New Radicals
5. I Get Around - Pennywise
August 11, 2005
Horse 385 - I am a lefty
In today's modern society this statement seems almost scandalous but seeing as governments are trying to negate their responsibilities by selling everything they have, society is worse off for it.
The national telco Telstra is a profitable business and has been the subject of countless ASIC investigations since the concept of anti-competitiveness was mooted but if you look at its stablemate Australia Post, it has neither the infrastructure nor the base from which to turn a profit and therefore no-one's pointed the finger.
Personally I think that all infrastructure providers be they electricity, water, telephone, roads, rail, airports etc are esentially public domain and therefore should be in the hands of a trustee, that is the government (for want of some better trustee) as custodian should not have had the rights to sell any of these.
There are a few counter arguments to public ownership of goods, the first of these is that property can not be publicly owned. This may be correct but a trustee holds property in trust for the benefit of the beneficiaries of the trust. Does this hold true for the government?
The capital consumption argument suggests that governments can not re-invest the profits generated by quangos. I argue this because all quangos are by inference run by an independant board of govenors and therefore must re-invest anything they have as prudent management - esentially no different from a public company.
So I'm a big lefty, but I argue that the government is no more incompetant than the private business who would run the same organisation afterwards. Profit motives can not plan beyond the next few years whereas governments need to look beyond the next elections, and sadly of late they don't.
The national telco Telstra is a profitable business and has been the subject of countless ASIC investigations since the concept of anti-competitiveness was mooted but if you look at its stablemate Australia Post, it has neither the infrastructure nor the base from which to turn a profit and therefore no-one's pointed the finger.
Personally I think that all infrastructure providers be they electricity, water, telephone, roads, rail, airports etc are esentially public domain and therefore should be in the hands of a trustee, that is the government (for want of some better trustee) as custodian should not have had the rights to sell any of these.
There are a few counter arguments to public ownership of goods, the first of these is that property can not be publicly owned. This may be correct but a trustee holds property in trust for the benefit of the beneficiaries of the trust. Does this hold true for the government?
The capital consumption argument suggests that governments can not re-invest the profits generated by quangos. I argue this because all quangos are by inference run by an independant board of govenors and therefore must re-invest anything they have as prudent management - esentially no different from a public company.
So I'm a big lefty, but I argue that the government is no more incompetant than the private business who would run the same organisation afterwards. Profit motives can not plan beyond the next few years whereas governments need to look beyond the next elections, and sadly of late they don't.
August 09, 2005
Horse 384 - 1000 Paper Cranes
Sadako Sasaki was a Japanese girl who lived near Misasa Bridge in Hiroshima, Japan. She was only two years old when the atomic bomb was dropped on Hiroshima on August 6, 1945. At the moment of explosion she was at her home, less than 2 miles from ground zero.
As she grew up, Sadako was a strong, courageous and athletic girl. In 1954, at age eleven, while practicing for a big race, she became dizzy and fell to the ground. Sadako was diagnosed with leukemia, which already in Japan had become known as the the "atom bomb disease".
Sadako's best friend told her of an old Japanese legend which said that anyone who folds a thousand origami paper cranes would be granted a wish. Sadako hoped that the gods would grant her a wish to get well so that she could run again. She spent fourteen months in the hospital, and she folded over 1,300 paper cranes before dying at the age of twelve. She folded the cranes out of her medicine bottle wrappers and any other paper she could find in hopes of getting better, to no avail...
In Hiroshima there stands a memorial in the Hiroshima Peace Memorial Museum depicting Sadako and one of the cranes she had folded. Also in the Peace Park is the 'Flame of Peace' that burns as long as Nuclear Weapons exist, I hope that one day we finally see it extinguished.
August 08, 2005
2 Quotes
Eisenhower wrote in his memoir The White House Years:
In 1945 Secretary of War Stimson, visiting my headquarters in Germany, informed me that our government was preparing to drop an atomic bomb on Japan. I was one of those who felt that there were a number of cogent reasons to question the wisdom of such an act? During his recitation of the relevant facts, I had been conscious of a feeling of depression and so I voiced to him my grave misgivings, first on the basis of my belief that Japan was already defeated and that dropping the bomb was completely unnecessary, and secondly because I thought that our country should avoid shocking world opinion by the use of a weapon whose employment, was I thought, no longer mandatory as a measure to save American lives.
MacArthur wrote in tabulations to a US Senate Committee:
Use of the atomic devices was completely unnecessary from a military point of view. We at that point had no intention to invade Japan, the threat of Russia entering the war with Japan on August 11 would have seen them accept the terms of Potsdam by well before September 1 and certainly Operation Starvation would have seen total surrender before October 1.
In 1945 Secretary of War Stimson, visiting my headquarters in Germany, informed me that our government was preparing to drop an atomic bomb on Japan. I was one of those who felt that there were a number of cogent reasons to question the wisdom of such an act? During his recitation of the relevant facts, I had been conscious of a feeling of depression and so I voiced to him my grave misgivings, first on the basis of my belief that Japan was already defeated and that dropping the bomb was completely unnecessary, and secondly because I thought that our country should avoid shocking world opinion by the use of a weapon whose employment, was I thought, no longer mandatory as a measure to save American lives.
MacArthur wrote in tabulations to a US Senate Committee:
Use of the atomic devices was completely unnecessary from a military point of view. We at that point had no intention to invade Japan, the threat of Russia entering the war with Japan on August 11 would have seen them accept the terms of Potsdam by well before September 1 and certainly Operation Starvation would have seen total surrender before October 1.
August 06, 2005
Horse 383 - Global Warming is Stupid
Can everyone quit their whining. Global warning is a fantastic idea. 99% of the world's population is saving up so that they can go somewhere on their holidays and all of a sudden global warming is a crime.
So there may be some layabouts on a Pacific island paradise who may get a bit wet, but how difficult is it to push a lean-to up a hill? The climate gives and the climate takes away. The climate gave them the paradise, so now it's time to take the good with the total flooding of their homes.
It is every generation's duty to leave a record of their being here. Do you think that the druids would have been harassed for leaving a few rocks? Would the Great Wall of China have been built if they had enviro-nazis?
How about asbestos? When that was found to be a dud, we invented fibreglass. Every generation solves the problems of the last and invents its own.
If future generations have a problem with the environment, tell them to get stuffed. I will not have whinging from people not yet born, and besides, I've always wanted to have a sunny beach holiday on Mawson Base, or in Wick or even in Oslo.
Who knows, within a generation we could develop the Orkneys so that they become a tourist resort like the Carribean, which would not only be cheaper in airfares for most Britons but because of the reduced air travel would actually save the environment because they wouldn't be putting as many pollutants into the air.
So there may be some layabouts on a Pacific island paradise who may get a bit wet, but how difficult is it to push a lean-to up a hill? The climate gives and the climate takes away. The climate gave them the paradise, so now it's time to take the good with the total flooding of their homes.
It is every generation's duty to leave a record of their being here. Do you think that the druids would have been harassed for leaving a few rocks? Would the Great Wall of China have been built if they had enviro-nazis?
How about asbestos? When that was found to be a dud, we invented fibreglass. Every generation solves the problems of the last and invents its own.
If future generations have a problem with the environment, tell them to get stuffed. I will not have whinging from people not yet born, and besides, I've always wanted to have a sunny beach holiday on Mawson Base, or in Wick or even in Oslo.
Who knows, within a generation we could develop the Orkneys so that they become a tourist resort like the Carribean, which would not only be cheaper in airfares for most Britons but because of the reduced air travel would actually save the environment because they wouldn't be putting as many pollutants into the air.
August 05, 2005
iFive - 5th Aug
One of the most enduring images that's ever been put on film is the rather famous performance of Audrey Hepburn as Holly Golightly in 1961's Breakfast at Tiffany's. As a result she played one of the most iconic characters in 20th Century cinema.
Although she could act with a poise that's seldom seen, to be honest she really didn't have much of a voice of a voice for singing. That could explain why Moon River was the only song that she ever committed to vinyl and even then it wasn't on the official soundtrack until the reprint in 1962 but it's a voice that sounds so fragile that's its non-inclusion was a travesty.
1. Moon River - Audrey Hepburn
2. Fat Girl - Mark Foggo's Skasters
3. Little By Little - Oasis
4. What U Do 2 Me - Boomkat
5. Millenium - Robbie Williams
Although she could act with a poise that's seldom seen, to be honest she really didn't have much of a voice of a voice for singing. That could explain why Moon River was the only song that she ever committed to vinyl and even then it wasn't on the official soundtrack until the reprint in 1962 but it's a voice that sounds so fragile that's its non-inclusion was a travesty.
1. Moon River - Audrey Hepburn
2. Fat Girl - Mark Foggo's Skasters
3. Little By Little - Oasis
4. What U Do 2 Me - Boomkat
5. Millenium - Robbie Williams
Horse 382 - Adidas & Reebok
German sports goods firm Adidas-Salomon says it has struck an agreement to buy US rival Reebok for 3.1bn euros. The tie-up could create a challenger to Nike in the US market. The takeover still needs to be approved by Reebok shareholders and competition authorities. If cleared, the deal should be completed in early 2006.
Reebok's shares rose to $51 as reports of takeover talks appeared on the websites of financial papers. Adidas' offer is worth $59 per share in cash. The combined group will have worldwide athletic footwear sales of 9bn euros, Adidas said. It would have about 20% of the US sports shoe market, while Nike has 36%.
The combined group's brands will be anchored by the Adidas and Reebok labels, but will also include Taylormade, Rockport and the la-dee-da Greg Norman Collection.
I want to know if either of these two companies have thought of the consumer in all of this? What happens to the Westies, Bogans, Bunnas, Booners, Neds, Chavs, Parkies, Townies, Derros and Carnies? About the only group not affected will be the Kappa Slappers. What will they all wear now? Addibok? Reedas?
Who thinks of these people? When they make these decisions, and more importantly how will it affect society? It's going to be really strange when a liquor store is robbed by a "23 year old gent, in an Armani suit with a tweed jacket, Julius Marlowes and a trilby" rather than a "punk in a black Reebok tracksuit".
Reebok's shares rose to $51 as reports of takeover talks appeared on the websites of financial papers. Adidas' offer is worth $59 per share in cash. The combined group will have worldwide athletic footwear sales of 9bn euros, Adidas said. It would have about 20% of the US sports shoe market, while Nike has 36%.
The combined group's brands will be anchored by the Adidas and Reebok labels, but will also include Taylormade, Rockport and the la-dee-da Greg Norman Collection.
I want to know if either of these two companies have thought of the consumer in all of this? What happens to the Westies, Bogans, Bunnas, Booners, Neds, Chavs, Parkies, Townies, Derros and Carnies? About the only group not affected will be the Kappa Slappers. What will they all wear now? Addibok? Reedas?
Who thinks of these people? When they make these decisions, and more importantly how will it affect society? It's going to be really strange when a liquor store is robbed by a "23 year old gent, in an Armani suit with a tweed jacket, Julius Marlowes and a trilby" rather than a "punk in a black Reebok tracksuit".
August 03, 2005
Horse 381 - Very Smelly
We humans do not have a very good sense of smell it must be said. Although we can smell things that are poisonous or otherwise harmful to us, the actual size of the receptors in one's nose are only about the size of a fingernail.
Dogs on the other hand are very well known for their keen sense of smell. They're employed at airports and other security venues to stop dangerous and contaminating items from entering through customs and things like drugs from passing on board.
My question then is this: If dogs have such a brilliant sense of smell, why then do they have this bizarre need to put their noses into poo?
Smell particles (for want of a better term) in the environment hang around after the person or item has left for quite some time. If I was to sit on the lounge and then sit at the kitchen table, a dog would be able to tell where I've been up to 6 hours later and it's this ability that's employed when tracking game and people once they've gone missing.
Why smell poo for, given that they can smell things well after they've gone?
I put it to you that dogs have far different interests than we do. I bet that if there was a bakery, then we'd want to stand as close to it or even inside the building if we could to experience the glorious smell of baking bread.
Poo tells dogs who else has been there, almost like the dog version of the newspaper. I suppose it's akin to people reading Hello! magazine.
Then I had another thought. If they have such an acute sense of smell, then how come it isn't damaged by sticking their noses into such a putrid smell source like poo.
I suspect that it has something to do with the tissue that the nose is composed of. In humans there are only three places in the human body that comprise erectile tissue: two I don't care to mention and the other is in the nose. This is most evidenced by our ability to flare our nostrils.
In dogs, this erectile tissue must be able to somehow close down the olfactory sense to the point that only a fraction of those smell particles hit the receptors.
It still doesn't look good though.
Dogs on the other hand are very well known for their keen sense of smell. They're employed at airports and other security venues to stop dangerous and contaminating items from entering through customs and things like drugs from passing on board.
My question then is this: If dogs have such a brilliant sense of smell, why then do they have this bizarre need to put their noses into poo?
Smell particles (for want of a better term) in the environment hang around after the person or item has left for quite some time. If I was to sit on the lounge and then sit at the kitchen table, a dog would be able to tell where I've been up to 6 hours later and it's this ability that's employed when tracking game and people once they've gone missing.
Why smell poo for, given that they can smell things well after they've gone?
I put it to you that dogs have far different interests than we do. I bet that if there was a bakery, then we'd want to stand as close to it or even inside the building if we could to experience the glorious smell of baking bread.
Poo tells dogs who else has been there, almost like the dog version of the newspaper. I suppose it's akin to people reading Hello! magazine.
Then I had another thought. If they have such an acute sense of smell, then how come it isn't damaged by sticking their noses into such a putrid smell source like poo.
I suspect that it has something to do with the tissue that the nose is composed of. In humans there are only three places in the human body that comprise erectile tissue: two I don't care to mention and the other is in the nose. This is most evidenced by our ability to flare our nostrils.
In dogs, this erectile tissue must be able to somehow close down the olfactory sense to the point that only a fraction of those smell particles hit the receptors.
It still doesn't look good though.
August 02, 2005
Horse 380 - Nation shall speak peace unto nation
Micah 4:3
He will judge between many peoples and will settle disputes for strong nations far and wide. They will beat their swords into plowshares and their spears into pruning hooks. Nation will not take up sword against nation, nor will they train for war anymore.
We shall beat our swords into plowshares.
One of the most famous sculptures of modern times stands in front of the United Nations headquarters in New York. There a powerfully built man is depicted beating a sword into a plowshare. It was sculpted by the Russian artist Ergenly Vuchetich and was dedicated in 1960. On the base are words, slightly altered from Isaiah 2:4 "We shall beat our swords into plowshares."
The thing that strikes me most about this in particular statue isn't what it is but the conditions under which it was created. The USSR was still very heavily communist and in the midst of The Cold War with the USA. It seems strange that a Russian of all people should cast a statue outside the UN headquarters, an organisation of which the Soviets were not members nor had any intent of joining at that time. It's even more ironic that the most powerful weapon ever created instilled fear into those who possessed it. The nuclear boogeyman quite ironically caused a peace far greater than the leaders would have allowed.
Nation shall speak peace unto nation
The BBC is a truly British institution, and I believe, their motto ,"Nation shall speak peace unto nation",is not merely rhetoric. The BBC , above all other media corporations seeks, not only to entertain and inform, but also to use the media for what it can best do for humanity, to educate.
No other British channel reaches so far beyond its shores. BBC websites are staggering in breadth and quality and how can we view this institution as conservative when, every day, it makes such very noble and extensive use of Internet technology to keep, not only its own people informed, but also the rest of the world?
Many people around the world rely on the BBC to provide their news via the World Service, news that is going on around the world without bias when under many circumstances their own governments try to control the state's media outlets. The Beeb because it's so large has to do its best to remain neutral under all circumstances through fear that any involvement could see loss of life of its own employees. Often it is via the BBC that many people around the world, learn English and it is for this reason more than any other that Received Pronunciation rather than American English is slowly becoming the standard.
Isaiah 2:1-3 is repeated in Micah 4:1-3; I'm quite sure that neither Isaiah nor Micah would have envisaged the world of the 21st century. I do know that both the founders of the UN and the governors of the BBC knew what they were doing when they borrowed these words though, peace is neither something that can be manufactured or won - it's usually the result of a surrender by one side after their sick and tired of hostilities.
The UN represents the world's wish to stop fighting each other, and the BBC for me represents the ideals to entertain and inform. Both in their own way are noble causes.
So what does this actually have to do with those passages in Isaiah and Micah? Well I don't know either, but perhaps a better scholar than I can find some link somewhere.
He will judge between many peoples and will settle disputes for strong nations far and wide. They will beat their swords into plowshares and their spears into pruning hooks. Nation will not take up sword against nation, nor will they train for war anymore.
We shall beat our swords into plowshares.
One of the most famous sculptures of modern times stands in front of the United Nations headquarters in New York. There a powerfully built man is depicted beating a sword into a plowshare. It was sculpted by the Russian artist Ergenly Vuchetich and was dedicated in 1960. On the base are words, slightly altered from Isaiah 2:4 "We shall beat our swords into plowshares."
The thing that strikes me most about this in particular statue isn't what it is but the conditions under which it was created. The USSR was still very heavily communist and in the midst of The Cold War with the USA. It seems strange that a Russian of all people should cast a statue outside the UN headquarters, an organisation of which the Soviets were not members nor had any intent of joining at that time. It's even more ironic that the most powerful weapon ever created instilled fear into those who possessed it. The nuclear boogeyman quite ironically caused a peace far greater than the leaders would have allowed.
Nation shall speak peace unto nation
The BBC is a truly British institution, and I believe, their motto ,"Nation shall speak peace unto nation",is not merely rhetoric. The BBC , above all other media corporations seeks, not only to entertain and inform, but also to use the media for what it can best do for humanity, to educate.
No other British channel reaches so far beyond its shores. BBC websites are staggering in breadth and quality and how can we view this institution as conservative when, every day, it makes such very noble and extensive use of Internet technology to keep, not only its own people informed, but also the rest of the world?
Many people around the world rely on the BBC to provide their news via the World Service, news that is going on around the world without bias when under many circumstances their own governments try to control the state's media outlets. The Beeb because it's so large has to do its best to remain neutral under all circumstances through fear that any involvement could see loss of life of its own employees. Often it is via the BBC that many people around the world, learn English and it is for this reason more than any other that Received Pronunciation rather than American English is slowly becoming the standard.
Isaiah 2:1-3 is repeated in Micah 4:1-3; I'm quite sure that neither Isaiah nor Micah would have envisaged the world of the 21st century. I do know that both the founders of the UN and the governors of the BBC knew what they were doing when they borrowed these words though, peace is neither something that can be manufactured or won - it's usually the result of a surrender by one side after their sick and tired of hostilities.
The UN represents the world's wish to stop fighting each other, and the BBC for me represents the ideals to entertain and inform. Both in their own way are noble causes.
So what does this actually have to do with those passages in Isaiah and Micah? Well I don't know either, but perhaps a better scholar than I can find some link somewhere.
August 01, 2005
Horse 379 - Frequency Jamming
Today may be the horses' birthday but tommorrow 2nd Aug marks the 25th anniversary of FM radio in Australia. In Sydney specifically it meant the beginning of 5 radio stations ABC Classic, ABC Regional, 2DAY FM, 2MMM and 2JJJ.
Whereas the J's had already been birthed on AM, 2Day and Triple M effectively broke new ground. Triple M decided to go for the approach taken by V103 in NYC and become the "rock" station whereas 2Day followed Z100 and became the "pop" station.
Now I'm not necessarily saying that the OFP's* who grew up in the 70's & 80's are being bad like, but it seems awfully strange that yet again 2 new stations are copies of things overseas.
DMG's Nova networks are for all intents and purposes, the Australian commercial equivalent of the BBC's Radio 1. Now forgive me if I'm wrong here but it appears as though DMG is now trying to create Radio 2.
Tommorrow 2nd Aug, on the 25th anniversary of FM Radio marks the Australian startup of DMG's new station for the "over 40's", Vega 95.3. Vega radio is trying very very hard to steal the market from 2BL, WSFM, 2GB, Triple M and MIX.
It sounds all the world to be a repeat of the BBC's realignment of Radios 1 & 2 in 1990 when it was decided that Radio 2 should become "what Radio 1 was 20 years ago". But herein lies the conundrum Nova was not around in 1980; therefore internally they don't have a start point... or do they?
This week to mark the 25th anniversary of Triple M, they'll be pulling stuff out of the archives including "The Rev. Dr. Doug Mulray". If Vega want a history lesson to find out where tommorrow's futures yesterdays lie, then a listen to Triple M and BBC's Radio 2 just may be the start that they'll be looking for.
*OFP - Old Farty Pants. ©1995 BJD. http://www.bjd.au.com
Whereas the J's had already been birthed on AM, 2Day and Triple M effectively broke new ground. Triple M decided to go for the approach taken by V103 in NYC and become the "rock" station whereas 2Day followed Z100 and became the "pop" station.
Now I'm not necessarily saying that the OFP's* who grew up in the 70's & 80's are being bad like, but it seems awfully strange that yet again 2 new stations are copies of things overseas.
DMG's Nova networks are for all intents and purposes, the Australian commercial equivalent of the BBC's Radio 1. Now forgive me if I'm wrong here but it appears as though DMG is now trying to create Radio 2.
Tommorrow 2nd Aug, on the 25th anniversary of FM Radio marks the Australian startup of DMG's new station for the "over 40's", Vega 95.3. Vega radio is trying very very hard to steal the market from 2BL, WSFM, 2GB, Triple M and MIX.
It sounds all the world to be a repeat of the BBC's realignment of Radios 1 & 2 in 1990 when it was decided that Radio 2 should become "what Radio 1 was 20 years ago". But herein lies the conundrum Nova was not around in 1980; therefore internally they don't have a start point... or do they?
This week to mark the 25th anniversary of Triple M, they'll be pulling stuff out of the archives including "The Rev. Dr. Doug Mulray". If Vega want a history lesson to find out where tommorrow's futures yesterdays lie, then a listen to Triple M and BBC's Radio 2 just may be the start that they'll be looking for.
*OFP - Old Farty Pants. ©1995 BJD. http://www.bjd.au.com
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