March 16, 2007

Horse 733 - Apathy Rules... Meh

If Jimmy cracked corn and people didn't care, then why did they write a song about it?
Today's Apathy Anonymous has been cancelled due to lack of interest.

Are you still here? Haven't lost interest yet? Why not close the browser and stare at a wall or something? I've got the cure for all known disease; I could make money grow on trees but that's not what motivates me, I'm interested in... aw stuff it.

Apathy. n. - I can't be bothered to do this bit.

The process of apathification has taken its strongest hold in Australia (which defies definition by being simultaneously an island, a continent and a country), where the power of apathy has been harnessed effectively to power all the major cities. With the rejection of the Kyoto Protocol by the current Howard Government, the only western country other than the United States not signing this agreement, the Howard Government has launched a large scale apathetic campaign toward the general population.
Apathetic power thus forms the basis of Howard's current energy and environmental policy. John Howard now pushes apathetic power as the solution to Global Warming having now abandoned his former promotion of Carbon Sequestration. The New South Wales state Labor government has followed suit and has publicised its plans to harness the unlimited supply of apathy to power the new desalination plant being built at Kurnell, NSW.

In recent years, activists have been working hard to fight the rising tide of apathy around the world. Thus far, the primary technique appears to be constant nagging, poking, and prodding. This generally does succeed in providing the recipient with some motivation, though it is often only the motivation to strike the activist hard, and this motivation subsequently vanishes once the act is complete.

Some researchers believe that highly-caffeinated coffee could be used to fight apathy, but its highly addictive nature, combined with recent reports of ultra-violence caused by drinking cheap instant coffee with artificial sweeteners, have made this choice impractical.

I have just noticed that the title should have been...
Horse 734 - Apathy Rules... Meh
but I can't be bothered to change that either.

1 comment:

James said...

You know, half of me's all for apathy, and the other half just doesn't care.