Horse 982 - Football Dislike by Maths

Football is about maths.

No really, it is. Sometimes it's about the amazing mental gymnastics you do to decide whether or not your team is likely to stay in the league, win promotion upwards to the next one or Europe or some such or even win the league itself. So them to my problem:

The problem I had at the weekend is that between Man Utd and Everton I can't decide who I dislike more. Perhaps we can resolve this with a series of mathematical postulates.

- Take two numbers x & y, such that x>y
- It follows that x/y > 1 and likewise y/x <>
- If x=y then x/y = 1

What happens if x and y represent my respect for Everton and Man Utd? Let them equal that respectively.

x=0, y=0

Then what?

x/y = ??? I don't know really because 0/0 is undefined.

That's probably a good thing, because in regular time during this FA Cup tie, the score ended up as 0-0. The result of which was a penalty shoot-out which I equally abhor. For the record Everton won the shoot-out 4-2.

Since I can't decide this using mathematics, I had to derive an answer via other means. Before this tie, Manchester Utd had the potential of scoring an unprecedented quintuple. Naturally I'd like to see them fail on every single one of those trophies (which may yet happen), but given the sheer hypocrisy of Sir Alex's rant about Rafa Benitez this week, I thought that that maybe had been the straw that broke the camel's back.

The truth is that I felt sort of sorry for Everton in one of those deep dark corners, and if it came down to it, I'd prefer to see them win trophies than that prize git Sir Alex Ferguson, and as for David Moyes? Well.. he did play for Preston North End (which is up there in terms of sheer yukkitude) but well... er... er... 0/0 is still undefined.

Manchester United may have lost, but Everton is in a Cup Final.

Not good!