What sort of weird sickos have been dredged up to get jobs as TV programmers these days? On any given day as many as 7 hours are completely devoid of any sporting content whatsoever. What has it all been replaced with? Cooking programs! Hours and hours of cooking programs.
You can't turn on the telly without some ponce waving a spatula in your face and asking you to smell his food's fantastic aroma. Well I had a sniff and from where I was sitting all I could smell was a pratt.
Healthy, Wealthy and Tedious. Two Naked Fat Ladies. Rick Nancy's - How to Cook a Gondola. All crap!
And the loony programmers get everything bumside up. One week we get a recipe for Chateux de Sheep which takes a week to prepare and the next we get Delia Smith taking three quarters on an hour telling us how to butter bread.
I've got a bit of advice for TV Programmers and their treating psychiatrists: The next time some mincing chef come to you with an idea for a cullinary journey, tell them to go and jump into the nearest lake. What else do you think the expression "Get Stuffed" is for?
Cooking programs - I tried to think of a more useless TV show and came up with nothing... except for Daryl Somers trying to sing on telly.
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